The Physical Appetites
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Chapter 3: 
The Halal And The Haram In Marriage And Family Life

The Physical Appetites

Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala created man as His vicegerent on earth in order that he might populate and rule it. Obviously this purpose cannot be realized unless the human species perpetuates itself, living, thriving, cultivating, manufacturing, building, and worshipping its Creator. Accordingly, the Creator has placed certain appetites and impulses in man so that he is impelled toward the various activities which guarantee the survival of the species.

Among the appetites which an individual must satisfy for his personal survival is that of food and drink. The sexual appetite, however, is for the purpose of the survival of the species. Sex is a strong driving force in the human being which demands satisfaction and fulfillment. Human beings have responded to the demands of the sexual appetite in three different ways:

  1. One way is to satisfy ones sexual need freely with whomever is available and whenever one pleases, without any restraints of religion, morality, or custom. This is the position of the advocates of free sex, for they do not believe in any religion. This philosophy reduces the human being to the status of an animal, and, if practiced universally, would result in the destruction of the family structure and of all society as we know it.

  2. The second approach is to suppress, and try to annihilate, the sexual drive; this approach is advocated by ascetic religions and other-worldly philosophies, approaches which lead toward monasticism and an escape from the world. Such advocacy of suppression of a natural appetite, or rather annihilation of its functioning, is contrary to Allah's plan and purpose, and is in conflict with the course of the natural order which requires the use of this appetite for the continuity of life.

  3. The third approach is to regulate the satisfaction of this urge, allowing it to operate within certain limits, neither suppressing nor giving it free rein. This is the stand of the revealed religions, which have instituted marriage and have prohibited fornication and adultery. In particular, Islam duly recognizes the role of the sexual drive, facilitates its satisfaction through lawful marriage, and just as it strictly prohibits sex outside of marriage and even what is conducive to it, it also prohibits celibacy and the shunning of women.

This is the just and intermediate position. If marriage were not permitted, the sexual instinct would not play its role in the continuation of the human species; while if fornication and adultery were not prohibited, the foundation of the family would be eroded. Unquestionably, it is only in the shade of a stable family that mercy, love, affection, and the capacity to sacrifice for others develop in a human being, emotions without which a cohesive society cannot come into being. Thus, if there had been no family system, there would have been no society through which mankind would be able to progress toward perfection.

 

The Prohibition of Approaching Zina

It is not surprising that all the revealed religions (According to the Qur'an there has been only one true, authentic faith, Al-Islam. Islam means the attainment of peace through conscientious and loving submission to the Will and Guidance of Allah. This was the mission of all Prophets and Messengers in human history. It is the same fundamental faith which was revealed to Moses, Jesus, and Muhammad (peace be upon them). The original revelations given to Moses and Jesus are no longer available in their complete, original and unadulterated form. The Qur'an is the only divine revelation which was meticulously preserved in it's complete, original, and unadulterated form. As such, it is to be used as the criterion to judge the authenticity of the present forms of previous revelations.) have prohibited fornication and adultery (zina) and have fought against these crimes against society. Islam, the last of the divinely revealed religions, is very strict in prohibiting zina, for it leads to confusion of lineage, child abuse, the breaking-up of families, bitterness in relationships, the spread of veneral diseases, and a general laxity in morals; moreover, it opens the door to a flood of lusts and self-gratifications. Assuredly, the command of Allah Ta'ala, And do not come near zina; indeed, it is an abomination and an evil way, (17:32), is just and true.

As we know, when Islam prohibits something, it closes all the avenues of approach to it. This is achieved by prohibiting every step and every means leading to the haram. Accordingly, whatever excites passions, opens ways for illicit sexual relations between a man and a woman, and promotes indecency and obscenity, is haram.

 

Khulwah

Islam prohibits khulwah (Privacy or khulwah denotes a man and woman's being alone together in a place in which there is no fear of intrusion by anyone else, so that an opportunity exists for sexual intimacy such as touching, kissing, embracing or even for intercourse.) between a man and a woman who are outside the degree of a mahrem relationship. (Mahrem denotes a relationship either by marriage or by close blood ties of such degree that marriage is permanently prohibited. With reference to a woman, a mahrem is either her husband or any male relative with whom marriage is permanently forbidden, such as her father, grandfather, son, brother, uncle or nephew. For the purposes of this discussion, all other relationships will be referred to as "non-mahrem." (Trans.)) The reason for this is not a lack of trust in one or both of them; it is rather to protect them from -wrong thoughts and sexual feelings which naturally arise within a man and a woman when they are alone together without the fear of intrusion by a third person. The Prophet (peace be on him) said: Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day must never be in privacy with woman without there being a mahrem (of hers) with her, for otherwise Satan will be the third person (with them). (Reported by Ahmad on the authority of 'Amir ibn Rabi'ah.)
Allah Ta'ala tells the Companions of the Prophet (peace be on him), ...And when you ask them (the Prophet's wives) for anything, ask them from behind a curtain; that is purer for your hearts and for their hearts.... (33:35)
In an explanation of this verse, Imam al-Qurtabi says, "This means such thoughts as occur to men regarding women and to women regarding men. This will remove any possibility of suspicion and accusation, and will protect (their) honor. This command implies that no one should trust himself to be in privacy with a non-mahrem woman; the avoidance of such situations is better for one's purity of heart, strength of soul, and perfection of chastity." (Tafsir of al-Qurtabi, vol. 14, p. 228.)

The Prophet (peace be on him) particularly warned women concerning khulwah with male-in-laws such as the husband's brother or cousin, since people are quite negligent in this regard, sometimes with disastrous consequences. It is obvious that a relative has easier access than a stranger to a woman's quarters, something concerning which no one would question him. The same is true of the wife's non-mahrem relatives, and it is prohibited for any of them to be in khulwah with her. The Prophet (peace be on him) said: 'Beware of entering where women are.' A man from the Ansar asked, 'O Messenger of Allah, what about the in-law?' He replied, 'The in-law (Al-Nawawi explains, "The in-law here means a relative of the husband other than his father and sons (who are mahrem to his wife), such as his brother, nephew, and cousins, etc., with whom marriage would be permissible for her, if she were to be divorced or widowed." Al-Mazari is of the opinion that it includes the husband's father as well. See Fath al-Bari, vol. 11, p. 344.) is death.'(Reported by al-Bukhari and Muslim.)
He meant that there are inherent dangers and even destruction in such privacy: religion is destroyed if they commit sin; the wife is ruined if her husband divorces her out of jealousy; and social relationships are torn apart if relatives become suspicious of each other.

The danger lies not merely in the possibility of sexual temptation. Itis even greater in relation to the possibility gossip about what is private and personal between the husband and wife by those who cannot keep secrets to themselves and relish talking about others; such talk has ruined many a marriage and destroyed many a home. In explaining the meaning of "The in-law is death," Ibn al-Atheer says, "It is an Arabic figure of speech like, 'The lion is death' or 'The king is fire,' which means that meeting a lion is similar to facing death and a confrontation with a king is like being in the fire. Thus privacy between an in-law and a woman is far more dangerous than in the case of a stranger because he might persuade her to do things against her husband's wishes, such as asking him for things he cannot afford, nagging him, and the like."

 

Looking With Desire at the Opposite Sex

What Islam prohibits in the sphere of sex includes looking at a member of the opposite sex with desire; for the eye is the key to the feelings, and the look is a messenger of desire, carrying the message of fornication or adultery. A poet of ancient times has said,
"All affairs begin with the sight; The raging fire a spark can ignite,"
while a contemporary poet declares,
"A look, then a smile, then a nod of the head, Then a talk, then a promise, then the warmth of a bed."

This is why Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala has commanded the believing men and the believing women alike to lower their gaze together with His command to guard their sexual parts: Tell the believing men that they should lower their gazes and guard their sexual organs; that is purer for them. Indeed, Allah is well-acquainted with what they do. And tell the believing women that they should lower their gazes and guard their sexual organs, and not display their adornment, except that which is apparent of it; and that they should draw their head-coverings over their bosoms, and not display their adornment except to their husbands or their fathers or their husbands' fathers, or their sons or their husbands' sons, or their brothers or their brothers' sons or their sisters' sons, or their women, or those whom their right hands possess, or male servants who lack sexual desire, or children who are not aware of women's nakedness; and that they should not strike their feet in order to make known what they hide of their adornment.... (24:30-31)

Several divine injunctions are contained in these two verses. Two of them pertain to both men and women, namely, the lowering of the gaze and the guarding of the sexual organs, while the rest are addressed exclusively to women.

A difference is to be noted here between the expressions, "lower their gazes" and "guard their sexual organs," signifying that while the sexual organs must be totally guarded without any leeway, the lowering of the gaze is only partial, because necessity and the general interest of the people require that some looking at members of the opposite sex be allowed.

"Lowering the gazes" does not mean that in the presence of the Opposite sex the eyes should be shut or that the head should be bowed toward the ground, since this would be impossible; in another place the Qur'an says, "Lower thy voice" (31:19), which does not mean sealing the lips. Here "lowering of the gazes" means to avert one's gaze from the faces of the passers-by and not to caress the attractive features of the members of the opposite sex with one's eyes. The Prophet (peace be on him) told 'All ibn Abu Talib, "Ali, do not let a second look follow the first. The first look is allowed to you but not the second.''(Reported by Ahmad, Abu Daoud, and al-Tirmidhi.)
The Prophet (peace be on him) considered hungry and lustful looks at a person of the opposite sex as "the zina of the eye," according to his saying, "The eyes also commit zina, and their zina is the lustful look." (Reported by al-Bukhari and others.)
He termed the lustful look zina because it gives sexual pleasure and gratification in an unlawful way. This is also what Jesus (peace be on him) is reported to have said in the Gospel of Matthew: You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery'. But I say to you that everyone who so much as looks at woman with evil desire for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. (Matt. 5:2728)

Indeed, such hungry and lustful looks are not merely a danger to chastity but they also result in agitation of the mind and disturbed thoughts. The poet says,
If you let your looks go a-wandering, Many charming sights will make your heart pine.
The one you see cannot belong to you altogether, Nor will your heart remain content with the little you saw.

 

The Prohibition of Looking at the 'Awrah of Others

Looking at the 'awrah (Awrah (lit., that which is to he hidden) denotes those parts of the body which Islam requires to be covered in front of others whether of the same or the opposite sex. (Trans.)) of another person must be avoided. The Prophet (peace be on him) forbade that any person should look at the 'awrah of another, whether of the same or the opposite sex, and whether with or without desire, saying, A man should not look at the 'awrah of another man, nor a woman of a woman, nor should a man go under one cloth with another man, nor a woman with another woman. (Reported by Muslim, Abu Daoud, and al-Tirmidhi. Scholars have inferred from this that two men, or two women, should not lie under the same covering so that parts of their bodies touch)

The 'awrah of a man referred to in this hadith is from his navel to his knee, although some scholars, such as Ibn Hazm and some Maliki jurists, do not include the knee. With respect to a man who is not her mahrem, a woman's 'awrah is her entire body excepting only her face and hands, while with respect to a mahrem such as her father or brother it is different. This we will discuss later.

What it is haram to look at is also of course haram to touch with the hands or with any other parts of the body.

What we have said concerning the prohibition of looking at or touching the parts of the body which must be covered becomes void in case of need or necessity such as first aid or medical treatment. At the same time, what we have said about the permissibility of looking becomes void in case of lust, as the ways leading to sin must be blocked.

 

What May Be Seen of the Man or Woman

It is clear from the above discussion that a woman may look at a man's body, apart from his 'awrah, which is from the navel to the knee, provided that her looking is free of lust and that no temptation is feared. The Prophet (peace on him) let 'Aishah watch the Abyssinians while they were engaging in spear play in the t courtyard of the Prophet's mosque; she watched their performance until she had enough and retired. (Reported by al-Bukhari and Muslim.)

Similarly, a man is permitted to look at a woman's face and hands, since they are not part of her 'awrah, provided that the looking is without lust and that no temptation is feared. 'Aishah narrated that her sister Asma once came to the Prophet (peace be on him) clad in transparent clothes which revealed her body. The Prophet (peace be on him) averted his gaze and told her, 'Asma, when a woman begins to menstruate, nothing should be seen of her except this and this,' and he pointed to his face and hands. (Reported by Abu Daoud.)
This hadith is classified as weak, but there are other sound ahadith which support the thesis that only the face and hands may be seen if they can be viewed without temptation.

In summary, the innocent look at what is other than the 'awrah of a man or a woman is permissible as long as it does not become an intent look or is repeated with perhaps a taint of pleasure and lust. It is the reasonableness of the Islamic Shari'ah that a glance which accidentally falls on something which it is not permissible to see is forgiven. Jarir ibn 'Abdullah narrated, "I asked the Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) about the unexpected glance. He replied, 'Avert your eyes,' meaning, do not look back deliberately." (Reported by Ahmad, Abu Daoud, Muslim, and al-Tirmidhi.)

 

The Display of Women's Adornment: What Is and What Is Not

Thus far we have discussed the subject of the lowering of the gaze, which is commanded for both menand women in the two verses cited. These verses also contain other divine instructions. Says Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala: That they should...not display their adornment, except that which is apparent of it. (24:31)

The adornment of women includes both natural features such as the face, hair, and other attractive parts of the body, and artificial enhancement of beauty, such as the dress, ornaments, make-up, and the like. In this noble ayah Allah Ta'ala commands women not to show their adornment "except that which is apparent of it."

There is some difference of opinion among scholars concerning the extent of this exception. Does it mean what is exposed by necessity and without intention, for example, if the wind exposes some part? Or does it mean what is customarily, or instinctively, or by its very nature exposed?

The majority of the early Muslim jurists accept the latter meaning. Ibn 'Abbas interprets "except what is apparent of it" to mean kohl and a ring, and Anas has said something similar; the permissibility of showing the face and hands is implicit in the permissibility of showing kohl and a ring. Sa'id ibn Jubayr, 'Ata and al-Awzai have stated explicitly that the showing of the face and hands is permissible. 'Aishah, Qatadah, and others have added bracelets to what may be shown of the adornments; this interpretation implies that a part of the arm may also be shown. Various scholars have allowed the exposure of the lower part of the arm up to a length varying between about four inches to one-half of the arm.

On the other hand, others such as 'Abdullah ibn Mas'ud, have restricted the application of "what is apparent" to what necessarily appears, such as the outer garment (abaya, jilbab, chaddor, burqa, and the like). My own preference lies with that group of the Companions and their immediate followers (This is the preferred opinion of al-Tabari, al-Qurtabi, al-Zamakhshari, al-Razi, and others from among the interpreters of the Qur'an, one may refer to their explanations of this verse of Surah al-Nun) who include the face, the hands, and their ordinary adornments, such as kohl and a ring in the application of the Qur'anic phrase, "except that which is apparent of it."

This permissibility, however, excludes such cosmetics which women today use for their cheeks, lips and nails. We consider these cosmetics to be excessive, and they must not be used except within a woman's own home when non-mahrem men are present. The aim of women in using these cosmetics when going out of the house is obviously to attract the attention of men, which is haram. At the same time, however, the interpretation of "what is apparent" as being the outer garment or covering is not acceptable, for this is not something which can possibly be concealed so that an exemption must be made; similarly, what the wind blows cannot be controlled, whether an exemption is made or not. What strikes the mind is that the purpose of the exemption was to provide some concession for the believing woman by permitting her to show something which it is possible to conceal. Reason would indicate that it is the face and hands which are exempted from covering.

Assuredly a woman is permitted to show her face and hands because covering them would be a hardship on her, especially if she must go out on some lawful business. For example, a widow may have to work to support her children, or a woman who is not well-off may have to help her husband in his work; had covering the face and hands been made obligatory, it would have occasioned such women hardship and distress. Al-Qurtabi says,
It seems probable that, since the face and hands are customarily uncovered, and it is, moreover, required that they be uncovered during acts of worship such as salat and hajj, the exemption (referred to in the verses of Surah al-Nur) pertains to them. This conclusion is supported by what Abu Daoud has transmitted on the authority of 'Aishah. She said that 'Asma, the daughter of Abu Bakr, once came to the Prophet (peace be on him) wearing transparent clothes. The Prophet (peace be on him) turned his face away from her and told her, 'Asma, when a woman begins to menstruate, nothing should be seen of her except this and this,' and he pointed to his face and hands.

In addition to this, we may infer from Allah's words, "Tell the believing men that they should lower their gazes," that the faces of the women of the Prophet's time were not veiled. Had the entire body including the face been covered, it would have made no sense to command them to lower their gaze, since there would have been nothing to be seen.

In spite of all this, however, because of the widespread immorality and laxity in obeying the Islamic injunctions in our time, the best thing for the Muslim woman is to conceal all her adornments including her face if she can. Obviously, more caution in this regard is necessary for a woman who is beautiful. Allah Ta'ala also says, ...That they should draw their head-coverings over their bosoms.... (24:31)

It is obligatory for the Muslim woman to cover her head, breasts, and neck completely so that nothing of them can be seen by onlookers. In addition, Allah Ta'ala says, ...And not display their adornment except to their husbands or their fathers.... (24:31)

This injunction prohibits women to show their concealed adornments, such as the ears, hair, neck, breasts, or ankles, to men who are outside the mahrem relationship, before whom they are permitted to expose only the face and hands (of "that which is apparent").

Twelve categories of persons are exempted from this prohibition:

  1. "Their husbands:" The husband and wife can see whatever they please of each other. A hadith states "Guard your nakedness ('awrah) except in front of your wife."

  2. "Their fathers," including the grandfathers from both mother's and father's sides as well.

  3. "Their husbands' fathers," for these are regarded as fathers to women.

  4. "Their sons," as likewise the grandsons from both sons and daughters.

  5. "Their husbands' sons (stepsons)," a necessity for normal interaction, since the woman is regarded as their mother.

  6. "Their brothers," including half - and step-brothers.

  7. "Their brothers' sons," since marriage is permanently prohibited between a man and his paternal aunt.

  8. "Their sisters' sons," since marriage is permanently prohibited between a man and his maternal aunt.

  9. "Their women," Meaning female relatives and sisters-in-faith, that is, other Muslim women. As for non-Muslim women, they are not allowed to see the Muslim woman's adornments other than what is allowed for non-mahrem men, and the correctness of this opinion is verified.

  10. "Those whom their right hands possess," refers to bondservants, because in Islam they are considered as members of the family. Some scholars restrict this permission to female bond-servants only.

  11. "Male servants who lack sexual desire," refers to hired hands or household servants who, because of some physical or mental condition, are devoid of sexual desire. This is applicable only under the following two conditions: that they are the servants of those into whose houses they are given entry and that they lack sexual desire.

  12. "Children who are not aware of women's nakedness." These are small children whose consciousness of sex is not yet developed. But if evidence of the sexual urge is noted among them, a woman should treat them like non-mahrem men even though they may not have reached puberty.

This verse does not mention maternal and paternal uncles because they customarily occupy the same status as the father. A hadith states, "The man's uncle is like his father." (Reported by Muslim.)

 

Women's 'Awrah

Whatever of the woman's body is not allowed to be shown constitutes her 'awrah. It must be covered, for exposing it is haram.

Consequently, with respect to non-mahrem men and non-Muslim women, a woman's 'awrah is her entire body with the exception of her face and hands, accordingto the interpretation we have preferred. We agree with al-Razi's argument that Islam has permitted her to expose those parts of the body, the face and hands, which need to be exposed in order to carry out daily busiand for giving and taking; it has commanded her to cover what it is not necessary to expose, and has forgiven her accidental, inadvertent exposures or such exposures as are required by necessity. All this is in accordance with the flexibility of Islam. Says al-Razi, "Since the showing of the face and hands is necessary, the jurists had no choice but to agree that they are not 'awrah, and since the showing of the feet is not necessary, they have differed concerning whether or not they are 'awrah.'' (Tafsir 'awrah.'' (Tafsir of Fakhr al-Deen al-Razi, vol. 20, pp. 205-206.)

With respect to the above-mentioned twelve categories of mahrem relatives, a woman is permitted to expose her hair, ears, neck, upper part of the chest, arms, and legs. Other parts of her body, such as the back, abdomen, thighs and two private parts, are not to be exposed before anyone, man or woman, excepting her husband.

The above interpretation of the ayah is closer to its intent than that of some other scholars who say that, with respect to her muharramah (Plural of mahrem. (Trans.)) and other Muslim women, the woman's 'awrah is the area between her navel and knee. Rather, the intent of the ayah seems to support the opinion of some scholars who say that with respect to her muharramah the woman's 'awrah is that part which is not exposed while she is doing her housework; that is, whatever is exposed during the course of her daily chores may be seen by men who are her muharramah.

That is why Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala commands the believing women to cover themselves with a loose over-garment whenever they go out, for in this way they may be distinguished from non-believing and loose women. Allah Ta'ala commanded His Prophet (peace be on him) to convey to the whole ummah of Islam this divine message: O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters and the believing women that they should put on their outer garments (jalabeebihinna); (That is, whenever they are outside the home or inside it when non-mahrem men are present. (Trans.)) that is most convenient in order that they may be recognized (as Muslims) and not be molested.... (33:59)

During the period of jahiliyyah some women used to go out with the attractive parts of their bodies, such as the neck, upper part of the breast and hair, exposed, and the loafers and lechers would follow them about. Accordingly, this noble ayah came down, commanding the believing woman to cover herself with her garment so that no provocative part of her body would be visible, because her appearance would make it clear to everyone that she is a chaste, believing woman, no lecher or hypocrite would dare to molest her.

It is clear from this verse that the reason for this injunction is not the fear of women's misbehavior or mistrust of them, as some people claim, but the danger to them from lecherous and evil men; for the woman who decks herself out, walks seductively, or talks invitingly always attracts men who lust after her. This verifies the Qur'anic verse, ...Then do not be too pleasant of speech, lest one in whose heart there is a disease should feel desire (for you).... (33:32)
Accordingly, Islam insists that the Muslim woman cover, and so protect herself; no concession is made in this except to reduce it somewhat for old women. Says Allah Ta'ala: And the elderly among women who are past (the prospect) of marriage—there is no blame on them if they lay aside their (outer) garments without displaying their adornment; but it is better for them to be modest. And Allah is Hearing, Knowing. (24:60)

By "the elderly among women" is meant such post-menopausal women as have no desire for marriage or sex, and to whom men are not attracted. Allah has made this concession for them so that they can put aside their covering garments, such as the chaddor, abaya, burqa, jilbab, and the like. However, the Qur'an makes the condition that this should not be for the purpose of displaying the* adornment but only for ease and comfort. Despite this concession, it is preferable and better for them to be more perfect in their dignity and far removed from any suspicion: "but it is better for them to be modest." (24:60)

 

Concerning Women Going to Public Baths

In consideration of Islam's concern for women's 'awrah and its proper covering, the Prophet (peace be on him) warned the Muslim woman against entering public baths and disrobing in front of other women, who might subsequently make her physical characteristics a topic of their gossip and vulgar comments.

Similarly, the Prophet (peace be on him) warned the Muslim man against entering public baths without a waist wrapper. Jabir narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) said, Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day must not enter the public bath without a lower garment (to cover his private parts), and whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day must not let his wife go to the public bath. (Al-Mondhari in Al-Targheeb says that this was reported by al-Nisai and by al-Tirmidhi, who classified it as "good.", Al-Hakim reported it and called it "sound.")
And 'Aishah said, At first the Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) prohibited people from going to public baths, but later allowed men to enter them wearing a lower garment. (The wording is from the report of Abu Daoud; also reported by al-Tirmidhi and Ibn Majah.)

Exception to this prohibition is made for the woman who suffers from some illness for which warm baths are beneficial and for women following childbirth. 'Abdullah ibn 'Amr narrated that the Prophet (peace be on him) said concerning public baths that Men must not enter them without a lower garment. Prevent women from entering them except when sick or after childbirth. (Reported by Ibn Majah and Abu Daoud. One of the transmitters is Abdur-Rahman Ziyadah ibn 'An'am al-Ifriqi.)
There is some weakness in the transmission of this hadith, but it is supported by the rules of the Shari'ah which makes concessions in worship and other obligations for a sick person, and by the well-known principle that what is prohibited as a precaution becomes permissible in the case of need or benefit. It is also supported by a hadith reported by al-Hakim on the authority of 'Abdullah ibn 'Abbas, who narrated that the Prophet (peace be on him) said, 'Beware of a building called the Public Bath.' Some people said, 'O Messenger of Allah, it certainly removes dirt and benefits the sick.' He then said, 'Then whoever enters should cover his nakedness.' (Reported by al-Hakim, who classifies it as "sound.")

If a woman enters a public bath without a valid reason or need, she has committed a haram act and deserves the censure of the Prophet (peace be on him). Abul Malih al-Hadhali reported that some women from Homs or Damascus came to visit 'Aishah and she said, "Are you from a place where women go to the public baths? I heard the Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) saying, A woman who removes her clothes (i.e., goes naked) outside her husband's house tears down the veil (hijab) between herself and her Lord.'' (Reported with this wording by al-Tirmidhi; also reported by Abu Daoud, Ibn Majah, and al-Hakim, who classified it as "sound" (al-targheeb).)
And Umm Salmah narrated that the Prophet (peace be on him) said,
"If any woman takes off her clothes outside her own house, Allah will tear His covering from her."

When Islam takes such a strict view of women's entering public baths which are, after all, buildings with four walls in which only women are allowed, imagine its judgement concerning the nearly-nude women lying about on beaches and the swimming pools, exposing their nakedness to the hungry and lustful eyes of every passer-by without any sense of shame. Assuredly they have torn down every veil between themselves and their most Merciful Lord. And their men are partners in their sin, since they are responsible protectors of their women. If only they knew!

 

The Prohibition of the Display of Women's Attractions

The morals and manners of the Muslim woman are quite different from those of non-Muslim women and the women of the time of jahiliyyah. The Muslim woman is chaste, dignified, self-respecting, and modest, while the woman who is ignorant of thedivine guidance may be vain, showy and anxious to display her attractions. Such display includes exposing the attractive parts of the body, walking or talking in a seductive manner, displaying her ornament", wearing revealing and sexy clothes, and the like.

The variety of ways in which women display their attractions is no secret to people, ancient or modern. In commenting on the verse concerning the women of the Prophet's household, And be in your houses, and do not make a display of yourselves in the manner of display of jahiliyyah...., (33:33)
Mujahid remarks, "Women used to walk about among men Qatadah says, 'They used to walk in a seductive and sensuous manner;' while Maqatil says, 'The displaying of attractions means putting a cloth on the head without tying it, and toying with the necklace, earrings, and other ornaments in a provocative fashion."'

The ways in which women displayed themselves during the period of pre-Islamic jahiliyyah included mingling freely with men, walking seductively, and wearing a head-covering in a manner which exposed the ornaments and beauties of the head and neck. But during the present period of ignorance of the divine guidance the display of feminine attractions has gone to such vulgar extremes that the women of the pre-Islamic era appear in contrast to be models of chastity and dignity!

 

How a Muslim Woman Should Conduct Herself

The correct Islamic behavior required of Muslim women which keeps them from wantonly displaying their attractions is characterized by the following:

  1. Lowering the gaze: Indeed, the most precious ornament of a woman is modesty, and the best expression of modesty is in the lowering of the gaze, as Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala says, ...And tell the believing women that they should lower their gazes.... (24:31)

  2. Not intermingling with men in such way that their bodies come in contact or that men touch women, as happens so often today in movie "heaters, university classrooms, auditoriums, buses, streetcars, and the like. Ma'qal ibn Yasar narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) said, It is better for one of you to be pricked in the head with an iron pick than to touch a woman whom it is unlawful to touch (Al-Mondhari says, "It (this hadith) is reported by al-Tabarani and al-Bayhaqi, and al-Tabarani's transmitters are authentic and sound.)

  3. Her clothing must conform to the standards laid down by the Islamic Shari'ah, which are as follows:

    1. Her dress must cover her entire body with the exception of "that which is apparent," which, according to the most preferable interpretation, refers to the face and hands.

    2. It must not be transparent, revealing what is underneath it. The Prophet (peace be on him) has informed us that, Among the dwellers of hell are such women as are clothed yet naked, seduced and being seduced. These shall not enter the Garden, nor shall (even) its fragrance reach them.
      Here the meaning of "clothed yet naked" is that their light, thin, transparent garments do not conceal what is underneath. Once some women of Bani Tamim, who were clad in transparent clothes, came to see 'Aishah, and she remarked, "If you are Believers, these are not the clothes which befit believing women." On another occasion, when a bride wearing a sheer and transparent head-covering was brought into her presence, she commented, "A woman who dresses like this does not believe in Surah al-Nur." (Surah 24, which together with Surah 33 (al-Ahzab) contains many injunctions concerning purity and propriety, man-woman relations, and dress. (Trans.))

    3. Her dress must not be too tight so as to define the parts of her body, especially its curves, even though it may not be transparent. This describes many of the styles of clothing current in the sensuous, materialistic civilization of the Western world, whose fashion designers compete with one another in devising clothing for women which tantalizingly emphasizes the bustline, waist, and hips, etc., in order to elicit the lustful admiration of men. Women who wear such clothes likewise fall under the definition of "clothed yet naked," since such a dress is often more provocative than one which is transparent.

    4. She must not wear clothes which are specifically for men, such as trousers in our time. The Prophet (peace be on him) cursed women who try to resemble men and men who resemble women, and prohibited women from wearing men's clothing and vice-versa.

    5. In her choice of clothing she should not imitate non-Muslims, whether they are Jews, Christians, or pagans, for Islam disapproves of conformity to non-Islamic modes and desires its followers to develop their own distinctive characteristics in appearance, as well as in beliefs and attitudes. This is why Muslims have been asked to be different from non-Muslims in many aspects, and why the Prophet (peace be on him) has said, "Whoever imitates a people is one of them."

  4. The Muslim woman walks and talks in a dignified and business-like manner, avoiding flirtatiousness in her facial expressions and movements. Flirting and seductive behavior are characteristics of wrong-minded women, not of Muslims. Allah Ta'ala says: ...Then do not be too pleasant of speech, lest one in whose heart there is a disease should feel desire (for you).... (33:32)

  5. She does not draw men's attention to her concealed adornment by the use of perfume or by jingling or toying with her ornaments or other such things. Allah says: They should not strike their feet in order to make known what they hide of their adornment.... (24:31)

The women of the time of jahiliyyah used to stamp their feet when they passed by men so that the jingling of their ankle-bracelets might be heard. The Qur'an forbade this, both because it might tempt a lecherous man to pursue her and also because it demonstrates the evil intention of the woman in attempting to draw the attention of men to herself. Similar is the Islamic ruling concerning the use of fragrant perfumes, since here again the intention is to attract men by exciting their desire. A hadith states, The woman who perfumes herself and passes through a gathering is an adulteress. (Al-Mondhari says, "This is reported by Abu Daoud and al-Tirmidhi, who classifies it as sound and good." It has also been reported by al-Nisai, Ibn Khazimah, and Ibn Hibban in the following words: "Any woman who perfumes herself and passes by a group of people so that her scent reaches them is an adulteress." Al-Hakim also reported this and said, "It has sound transmitters.")

From all this we know that Islam does not require, as some people claim, that a woman should remain confined to her house until death takes her out to her grave. On the contrary, she may go out for salat, for her studies, and for her other lawful needs, both religious and secular, as was customary among the women of the families of the Companions and the women of later generations. Moreover, this early period of Islam is considered by all Muslims to be the best and most exemplary period in the history of Islam. Among the women of this time were those who took part in battles in the company of the Prophet himself (peace be on him), and after that under the caliphs and their commanders. The Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) told his wife Saudah, "Allah has permitted you to go out for your needs." (Reported by al-Bukhari in his book Marriage in the chapter entitled "Women May Go Out For Their Needs," on the authority of 'Aishah.)
He also said, "If someone's wife asks his permission to go to the mosque, he should not deny it to her." (Reported by al-Bukhari, on the authority of 'Umar.)
On another occasion he said, "Do not prevent the bond-maids of Allah from (going to) Allah's mosques." (Reported by Muslim.)

Some very strict scholars are of the opinion that a woman is not allowed to see any part of a man wis not her mahrem. They base their ruling on a hadith reported by al-Tirmidhi on the authority of Nabhan, the slave of Umm Salmah, that the Prophet (peace be on him) told Umm Salmah and Maymunah, his wives, to veil themselves when Ibn Umm Maktum entered. "But he is blind," they said. The Prophet (peace be on him) replied, "Buare you blind, too? Do you not see him?"

However, researchers say that the manner in which this hadith has been transmitted renders it unsound. While the narrator here is Umm Salmah, the transmitter is her slave Nabhan, who had no concern with the incident nor any need to report it. Even if the hadith is sound, it simply shows that the Prophet (peace be on him) was very strict in respect to his wives because their exceptional status required greater modesty on their part; Abu Daoud and other great scholars have commented on this exceptional position of the wives of the Prophet (peace be on him). In any case, the significance of the following well-established and sound hadith remains uncontested: The Prophet (peace be on him) instructed Fatimah bint Qais to spend the required period of confinement ('iddah) following the death of her husband at the house of Umm Sharik. But he later changed his mind, saying, My Companions gather in her house. Go and stay with Ibn Umm Maktum, since he is a blind man. If you uncover yourself he will not see you. (Tafsir of al-Qurtabi, vol. 11, p. 228.)

 

A Woman's Serving Male Guests

A woman may serve her husband's guests in his presence as long as she adheres to the Islamic standards in her dress, movements, and speech. They will naturally see her and she will see them, and there is no harm in this as long as there is no danger of involvement on either side.

Al-Bukhari, Muslim, and others have reported Sahl ibn Sa'd al-Ansari as saying, Abu Usayd al-Sa'adi invited the Prophet (peace be on him) and his Companions to his wedding. The food was prepared and served by none other than his wife, Umm Usayd. She had soaked some dates in milk in a stone pot overnight. When the Prophet (peace be on him) had finished his meal, she mashed the dates and brought the drink to him.

Shaikh al-Islam Ibn Hajar commented that, "From this hadith we conclude that a woman is permitted to serve her husband and his male visitors, just as the husband is permitted to serve his wife. It is evident that her serving the visitors is allowed only if there is no fear of temptation and if she is properly dressed; if the wife is not properly dressed (as is the case with a majority of women in our time) her appearing in front of men is haram."

 

Sexual Perversion: A Major Sin

We must be aware that in regulating the sexual drive Islam has prohibited not only illicit sexual relations and all ways which lead to them, but also the sexual deviation known as homosexuality. This perverted act is a reversal of the natural order, a corruption of man's sexuality, and a crime against the rights of females. (The same applies equally in the case of female homosexuality. (Trans.))

The spread of this depraved practice in a society disrupts its natural life pattern and makes those who practice it slaves to their lusts, depriving them of decent taste, decent morals, and a decent manner of living. The story of the people of the prophet Lut (Lot) as narrated in the Qur'an should be sufficient for us. Lut's people were addicted to this shameless depravity, abandoning natural, pure, lawful relations with women in the pursuit of this unnatural, foul and illicit practice. That is why their prophet, Lut (peace be on him), told them, What! Of all creatures, do you approach males and leave the spouses whom your Lord has created for you? Indeed, you are people transgressing (all limits)! (26: 165-166)

The strangest expression of these peoples' perversity of nature, lack of guidance, depravity of morals, and aberration of taste was their attitude toward the guests of the prophet Lut (peace be on him) who were angels of punishment in human form sent by Allah to try these people and to expose their perversity. The Qur'an narrates the story thus: And when Our messengers came to Lut, he was grieved on their account and did not know how to protect them. He said, 'This is a day of distress.' And his people, who had long since been practicing abominations, came rushing toward him. He said, 'O my people, here are my daughters. They are purer for you, so fear Allah and do not disgrace me in front of my guests. Is there not a single upright man among you?' They said, 'Thou knowest well that we have no right to thy daughters, and certainly thou knowest what we want.' He said, 'If only I had strength to resist you or had some powerful support!' Said (the angels) 'O Lut, truly, we are messengers of thy Lord; they shall not reach thee....'(11:77-81)

The jurists of Islam have held differing opinions concerning the punishment for this abominable practice. Should it be the same as the punishment for fornication, or should both the active and passive participants be put to death? While such punishments may seem cruel, they have been suggested to maintain the purity of the Islamic society and to keep it clean of perverted elements.

 

A Ruling Concerning Masturbation

The pressing need to relieve himself of sexual tension may drive a young man to masturbation.

The majority of scholars consider it haram. Imam Malik bases his judgement on the verse, Those who guard their sexual organs except with their spouses or those whom their right hands possess, for (with regard to them) they are without blame. But those who crave something beyond that are transgressors, (23:5-7) arguing that the masturbator is one of those who "crave something beyond that."

On the other hand, it is reported that Imam Ahmad Ibn Hanbal regarded semen as an excretion of the body like other excrete and permitted its expulsion as blood letting is permitted. Ibn Hazm holds the same view. However, the Hanbali jurists permit masturbation only under two conditions: first, the fear of committing fornication or adultery, and second, not having the means to marry.

We are inclined to accept the opinion of Imam Ahmad in a situation in which there is sexual excitation and danger of committing the haram. For example, a young man has gone abroad to study or work, thereby encountering many temptations which he fears he will be unable to resist, may resort to this method of relieving sexual tension provided he does not do it excessively or make it into a habit.

Yet better than this is the Prophet's advice to the Muslim youth who is unable to marry, namely, that he seek help through frequent fasting, for fasting nurtures will-power, teaches control of desires, and strengthens the fear of Allah. The Prophet (peace be on him) said, Young men, those of you who can support a wife should marry, for it keeps you from looking at women (lit., lowers your gaze) and preserves your chastity; but those who cannot should fast, for it is a means of cooling sexual passion. (Reported by al-Bukhari.)

 

 
 

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