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Chapter
3:
The Halal And The Haram In Marriage And Family Life
Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala
created man as His vicegerent on earth in order that he might populate and rule it.
Obviously this purpose cannot be realized unless the human species perpetuates itself,
living, thriving, cultivating, manufacturing, building, and worshipping its Creator.
Accordingly, the Creator has placed certain appetites and impulses in man so that he is
impelled toward the various activities which guarantee the survival of the species.
Among the appetites which an individual must satisfy for his personal
survival is that of food and drink. The sexual appetite, however, is for the purpose of
the survival of the species. Sex is a strong driving force in the human being which
demands satisfaction and fulfillment. Human beings have responded to the demands of the
sexual appetite in three different ways:
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One way is to satisfy ones sexual need
freely with whomever is available and whenever one pleases, without any restraints of
religion, morality, or custom. This is the position of the advocates of free sex, for they
do not believe in any religion. This philosophy reduces the human being to the status of
an animal, and, if practiced universally, would result in the destruction of the family
structure and of all society as we know it.
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The second approach is to suppress, and
try to annihilate, the sexual drive; this approach is advocated by ascetic religions and
other-worldly philosophies, approaches which lead toward monasticism and an escape from
the world. Such advocacy of suppression of a natural appetite, or rather annihilation of
its functioning, is contrary to Allah's plan and purpose, and is in conflict with the
course of the natural order which requires the use of this appetite for the continuity of
life.
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The third approach is to regulate the
satisfaction of this urge, allowing it to operate within certain limits, neither
suppressing nor giving it free rein. This is the stand of the revealed religions, which
have instituted marriage and have prohibited fornication and adultery. In particular,
Islam duly recognizes the role of the sexual drive, facilitates its satisfaction through
lawful marriage, and just as it strictly prohibits sex outside of marriage and even what
is conducive to it, it also prohibits celibacy and the shunning of women.
This is the just and intermediate position. If marriage were not
permitted, the sexual instinct would not play its role in the continuation of the human
species; while if fornication and adultery were not prohibited, the foundation of the
family would be eroded. Unquestionably, it is only in the shade of a stable family that
mercy, love, affection, and the capacity to sacrifice for others develop in a human being,
emotions without which a cohesive society cannot come into being. Thus, if there had been
no family system, there would have been no society through which mankind would be able to
progress toward perfection.
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It is not surprising that all
the revealed religions (According to
the Qur'an there has been only one true, authentic faith, Al-Islam. Islam means the
attainment of peace through conscientious and loving submission to the Will and Guidance
of Allah. This was the mission of all Prophets and Messengers in human history. It is the
same fundamental faith which was revealed to Moses, Jesus, and Muhammad (peace be upon
them). The original revelations given to Moses and Jesus are no longer available in their
complete, original and unadulterated form. The Qur'an is the only divine revelation which
was meticulously preserved in it's complete, original, and unadulterated form. As such, it
is to be used as the criterion to judge the authenticity of the present forms of previous
revelations.) have prohibited fornication and adultery (zina) and have fought against these crimes against society. Islam, the last of the
divinely revealed religions, is very strict in prohibiting zina, for it leads to
confusion of lineage, child abuse, the breaking-up of families, bitterness in
relationships, the spread of veneral diseases, and a general laxity in morals; moreover,
it opens the door to a flood of lusts and self-gratifications. Assuredly, the command of
Allah Ta'ala, And do not come near
zina; indeed, it is an abomination and an evil way,
(17:32), is just and true.
As we know, when Islam prohibits something, it closes all the avenues
of approach to it. This is achieved by prohibiting every step and every means leading to
the haram. Accordingly, whatever excites passions, opens ways for illicit sexual
relations between a man and a woman, and promotes indecency and obscenity, is haram.
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Islam prohibits khulwah (Privacy or khulwah denotes a man and woman's
being alone together in a place in which there is no fear of intrusion by anyone else, so
that an opportunity exists for sexual intimacy such as touching, kissing, embracing or
even for intercourse.) between a man and a woman who
are outside the degree of a mahrem relationship. (Mahrem denotes a relationship either by marriage or by close
blood ties of such degree that marriage is permanently prohibited. With reference to a
woman, a mahrem is either her husband or any male relative with whom marriage is
permanently forbidden, such as her father, grandfather, son, brother, uncle or nephew. For
the purposes of this discussion, all other relationships will be referred to as
"non-mahrem." (Trans.)) The reason for this
is not a lack of trust in one or both of them; it is rather to protect them from -wrong
thoughts and sexual feelings which naturally arise within a man and a woman when they are
alone together without the fear of intrusion by a third person. The Prophet (peace be on
him) said: Whoever believes in Allah
and the Last Day must never be in privacy with woman without there being a mahrem (of hers)
with her, for otherwise Satan will be the third person (with them). (Reported by
Ahmad on the authority of 'Amir ibn Rabi'ah.)
Allah Ta'ala tells the Companions of the Prophet (peace
be on him), ...And when you ask them
(the Prophet's wives) for anything, ask them from behind a curtain; that is purer for your
hearts and for their hearts.... (33:35)
In an explanation of this verse, Imam al-Qurtabi says, "This means such thoughts as
occur to men regarding women and to women regarding men. This will remove any possibility
of suspicion and accusation, and will protect (their) honor. This command implies that no
one should trust himself to be in privacy with a non-mahrem woman; the avoidance of such
situations is better for one's purity of heart, strength of soul, and perfection of
chastity." (Tafsir of al-Qurtabi, vol. 14, p. 228.)
The Prophet (peace be on him)
particularly warned women concerning khulwah with male-in-laws such as the
husband's brother or cousin, since people are quite negligent in this regard, sometimes
with disastrous consequences. It is obvious that a relative has easier access than a
stranger to a woman's quarters, something concerning which no one would question him. The
same is true of the wife's non-mahrem relatives, and it is prohibited for any of them to
be in khulwah with her. The Prophet (peace be on him) said: 'Beware of entering where women are.' A man from the Ansar
asked, 'O Messenger of Allah, what about the in-law?' He replied, 'The in-law (Al-Nawawi explains, "The in-law here means a
relative of the husband other than his father and sons (who are mahrem to his
wife), such as his brother, nephew, and cousins, etc., with whom marriage would be
permissible for her, if she were to be divorced or widowed." Al-Mazari is of
the opinion that it includes the husband's father as well. See Fath al-Bari, vol.
11, p. 344.) is death.'(Reported by al-Bukhari and Muslim.)
He meant that there are inherent dangers and even destruction in such privacy:
religion is destroyed if they commit sin; the wife is ruined if her husband divorces her
out of jealousy; and social relationships are torn apart if relatives become suspicious of
each other.
The danger lies not merely in the possibility of sexual temptation.
Itis even greater in relation to the possibility gossip about what is private and personal
between the husband and wife by those who cannot keep secrets to themselves and relish
talking about others; such talk has ruined many a marriage and destroyed many a home. In
explaining the meaning of "The in-law is death," Ibn al-Atheer says, "It is
an Arabic figure of speech like, 'The lion is death' or 'The king is fire,' which means
that meeting a lion is similar to facing death and a confrontation with a king is like
being in the fire. Thus privacy between an in-law and a woman is far more dangerous than
in the case of a stranger because he might persuade her to do things against her husband's
wishes, such as asking him for things he cannot afford, nagging him, and the like."
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What Islam prohibits in the
sphere of sex includes looking at a member of the opposite sex with desire; for the eye is
the key to the feelings, and the look is a messenger of desire, carrying the message of
fornication or adultery. A poet of ancient times has said,
"All affairs begin with the
sight; The raging fire a spark can ignite,"
while a contemporary poet declares,
"A look, then a smile, then a
nod of the head, Then a talk, then a promise, then the warmth of a bed."
This is why Allah Subhanahu wa
Ta'ala has commanded the believing men and the believing women alike to lower their gaze
together with His command to guard their sexual parts: Tell the believing men that they should lower their gazes and guard
their sexual organs; that is purer for them. Indeed, Allah is well-acquainted with what
they do. And tell the believing women that they should lower their gazes and guard their
sexual organs, and not display their adornment, except that which is apparent of it; and
that they should draw their head-coverings over their bosoms, and not display their
adornment except to their husbands or their fathers or their husbands' fathers, or their
sons or their husbands' sons, or their brothers or their brothers' sons or their sisters'
sons, or their women, or those whom their right hands possess, or male servants who lack
sexual desire, or children who are not aware of women's nakedness; and that they should
not strike their feet in order to make known what they hide of their adornment.... (24:30-31)
Several divine injunctions are contained in these two verses. Two of them
pertain to both men and women, namely, the lowering of the gaze and the guarding of the
sexual organs, while the rest are addressed exclusively to women.
A difference is to be noted here between the expressions, "lower
their gazes" and "guard their sexual organs," signifying that while the
sexual organs must be totally guarded without any leeway, the lowering of the gaze is only
partial, because necessity and the general interest of the people require that some
looking at members of the opposite sex be allowed.
"Lowering the gazes" does not mean that in the presence of the
Opposite sex the eyes should be shut or that the head should be bowed toward the ground,
since this would be impossible; in another place the Qur'an says, "Lower thy voice" (31:19), which does not mean sealing the lips. Here "lowering
of the gazes" means to avert one's gaze from the faces of the passers-by and not to
caress the attractive features of the members of the opposite sex with one's eyes. The
Prophet (peace be on him) told 'All ibn Abu Talib, "Ali, do not let a second look follow the first. The first look is
allowed to you but not the second.''(Reported
by Ahmad, Abu Daoud, and al-Tirmidhi.)
The Prophet (peace be on him) considered hungry and
lustful looks at a person of the opposite sex as "the zina of the eye,"
according to his saying, "The
eyes also commit zina, and their zina is the lustful look." (Reported by al-Bukhari and others.)
He termed the lustful look zina because it gives
sexual pleasure and gratification in an unlawful way. This is also what Jesus (peace be on
him) is reported to have said in the Gospel of Matthew: You have heard that it was said,
'You shall not commit adultery'. But I say to you that everyone who so much as looks at
woman with evil desire for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
(Matt. 5:2728)
Indeed, such hungry and lustful looks are not merely a danger to
chastity but they also result in agitation of the mind and disturbed thoughts. The poet
says,
If you let your looks go
a-wandering, Many charming sights will make your heart pine.
The one you see cannot belong to you altogether, Nor will your heart remain content with
the little you saw.
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Looking at the 'awrah (Awrah (lit., that which is to he hidden)
denotes those parts of the body which Islam requires to be covered in front of others
whether of the same or the opposite sex. (Trans.)) of
another person must be avoided. The Prophet (peace be on him) forbade that any person
should look at the 'awrah of another, whether of the same or the opposite sex, and
whether with or without desire, saying, A
man should not look at the 'awrah of another man, nor a woman of a woman, nor
should a man go under one cloth with another man, nor a woman with another woman.
(Reported by
Muslim, Abu Daoud, and al-Tirmidhi. Scholars have inferred from this that two men, or two
women, should not lie under the same covering so that parts of their bodies touch)
The 'awrah of a man referred
to in this hadith is from his navel to his knee, although some scholars, such as
Ibn Hazm and some Maliki jurists, do not include the knee. With respect to a man who is
not her mahrem, a woman's 'awrah is her entire body excepting only her face
and hands, while with respect to a mahrem such as her father or brother it is
different. This we will discuss later.
What it is haram to look at is also of course haram to
touch with the hands or with any other parts of the body.
What we have said concerning the prohibition of looking at or touching
the parts of the body which must be covered becomes void in case of need or necessity such
as first aid or medical treatment. At the same time, what we have said about the
permissibility of looking becomes void in case of lust, as the ways leading to sin must be
blocked.
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It is clear from the above
discussion that a woman may look at a man's body, apart from his 'awrah, which is
from the navel to the knee, provided that her looking is free of lust and that no
temptation is feared. The Prophet (peace on him) let 'Aishah watch the Abyssinians while
they were engaging in spear play in the t courtyard of the Prophet's mosque; she watched
their performance until she had enough and retired. (Reported by
al-Bukhari and Muslim.)
Similarly, a man is permitted to
look at a woman's face and hands, since they are not part of her 'awrah, provided
that the looking is without lust and that no temptation is feared. 'Aishah narrated that
her sister Asma once came to the Prophet (peace be on him) clad in transparent clothes
which revealed her body. The Prophet (peace be on him) averted his gaze and told her,
'Asma, when a woman begins to menstruate, nothing
should be seen of her except this and this,' and he pointed to his face and hands. (Reported by Abu Daoud.)
This hadith is classified as weak, but there are
other sound ahadith which support the thesis that only the face and hands may be
seen if they can be viewed without temptation.
In summary, the innocent look at what is other than the 'awrah of
a man or a woman is permissible as long as it does not become an intent look or is
repeated with perhaps a taint of pleasure and lust. It is the reasonableness of the
Islamic Shari'ah that a glance which accidentally falls on something which it is
not permissible to see is forgiven. Jarir ibn 'Abdullah narrated, "I asked the
Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) about the unexpected glance. He replied,
'Avert your eyes,' meaning, do not look back deliberately." (Reported by Ahmad, Abu
Daoud, Muslim, and al-Tirmidhi.)
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Thus far we have discussed
the subject of the lowering of the gaze, which is commanded for both menand women in the
two verses cited. These verses also contain other divine instructions. Says Allah
Subhanahu wa Ta'ala: That they
should...not display their adornment, except that which is apparent of it. (24:31)
The adornment of women includes both natural features such as the face,
hair, and other attractive parts of the body, and artificial enhancement of beauty, such
as the dress, ornaments, make-up, and the like. In this noble ayah Allah Ta'ala
commands women not to show their adornment "except that which is apparent of
it."
There is some difference of opinion among scholars concerning the
extent of this exception. Does it mean what is exposed by necessity and without intention,
for example, if the wind exposes some part? Or does it mean what is customarily, or
instinctively, or by its very nature exposed?
The majority of the early Muslim jurists accept the latter meaning. Ibn
'Abbas interprets "except what is apparent of it" to mean kohl and a
ring, and Anas has said something similar; the permissibility of showing the face and
hands is implicit in the permissibility of showing kohl and a ring. Sa'id ibn
Jubayr, 'Ata and al-Awzai have stated explicitly that the showing of the face and hands is
permissible. 'Aishah, Qatadah, and others have added bracelets to what may be shown of the
adornments; this interpretation implies that a part of the arm may also be shown. Various
scholars have allowed the exposure of the lower part of the arm up to a length varying
between about four inches to one-half of the arm.
On the other hand, others such as 'Abdullah ibn
Mas'ud, have restricted
the application of "what is apparent" to what necessarily appears, such as the
outer garment (abaya, jilbab, chaddor, burqa, and the like). My own preference lies
with that group of the Companions and their immediate followers (This is the preferred opinion of al-Tabari, al-Qurtabi,
al-Zamakhshari, al-Razi, and others from among the interpreters of the Qur'an, one may
refer to their explanations of this verse of Surah al-Nun) who include the face, the hands, and their ordinary adornments, such as kohl and
a ring in the application of the Qur'anic phrase, "except that which is apparent of
it."
This permissibility, however, excludes such cosmetics which women today
use for their cheeks, lips and nails. We consider these cosmetics to be excessive, and
they must not be used except within a woman's own home when non-mahrem men are present.
The aim of women in using these cosmetics when going out of the house is obviously to
attract the attention of men, which is haram. At the same time, however, the
interpretation of "what is apparent" as being the outer garment or covering is
not acceptable, for this is not something which can possibly be concealed so that an
exemption must be made; similarly, what the wind blows cannot be controlled, whether an
exemption is made or not. What strikes the mind is that the purpose of the exemption was
to provide some concession for the believing woman by permitting her to show something
which it is possible to conceal. Reason would indicate that it is the face and hands which
are exempted from covering.
Assuredly a woman is permitted to show her face and hands because
covering them would be a hardship on her, especially if she must go out on some lawful
business. For example, a widow may have to work to support her children, or a woman who is
not well-off may have to help her husband in his work; had covering the face and hands
been made obligatory, it would have occasioned such women hardship and distress.
Al-Qurtabi says,
It seems probable that, since the face and hands are customarily uncovered, and it is,
moreover, required that they be uncovered during acts of worship such as salat and hajj,
the exemption (referred to in the verses of Surah al-Nur) pertains to them. This
conclusion is supported by what Abu Daoud has transmitted on the authority of
'Aishah. She
said that 'Asma, the daughter of Abu Bakr, once came to the Prophet (peace be on him)
wearing transparent clothes. The Prophet (peace be on him) turned his face away from her
and told her, 'Asma, when a woman begins to menstruate, nothing should be seen of her
except this and this,' and he pointed to his face and hands.
In addition to this, we may infer from Allah's words, "Tell the
believing men that they should lower their gazes," that the faces of the women of the
Prophet's time were not veiled. Had the entire body including the face been covered, it
would have made no sense to command them to lower their gaze, since there would have been
nothing to be seen.
In spite of all this, however, because of the widespread immorality and
laxity in obeying the Islamic injunctions in our time, the best thing for the Muslim woman
is to conceal all her adornments including her face if she can. Obviously, more caution in
this regard is necessary for a woman who is beautiful. Allah Ta'ala also says, ...That they should draw their head-coverings
over their bosoms.... (24:31)
It is obligatory for the Muslim woman to cover her head, breasts, and
neck completely so that nothing of them can be seen by onlookers. In addition, Allah
Ta'ala says, ...And not display
their adornment except to their husbands or their fathers.... (24:31)
This injunction prohibits women to show their concealed adornments,
such as the ears, hair, neck, breasts, or ankles, to men who are outside the mahrem relationship,
before whom they are permitted to expose only the face and hands (of "that which is
apparent").
Twelve categories of persons are exempted from this prohibition:
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"Their husbands:" The husband
and wife can see whatever they please of each other. A hadith states "Guard your nakedness
('awrah) except in
front of your wife."
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"Their fathers," including the grandfathers from both mother's and father's
sides as well.
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"Their husbands' fathers,"
for these are regarded as fathers to women.
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"Their sons," as likewise the
grandsons from both sons and daughters.
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"Their husbands' sons
(stepsons)," a necessity for normal interaction, since the woman is regarded as their
mother.
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"Their brothers," including
half - and step-brothers.
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"Their brothers' sons," since
marriage is permanently prohibited between a man and his paternal aunt.
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"Their sisters' sons," since
marriage is permanently prohibited between a man and his maternal aunt.
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"Their women," Meaning female
relatives and sisters-in-faith, that is, other Muslim women. As for non-Muslim women, they
are not allowed to see the Muslim woman's adornments other than what is allowed for
non-mahrem men, and the correctness of this opinion is verified.
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"Those whom their right hands
possess," refers to bondservants, because in Islam they are considered as members of
the family. Some scholars restrict this permission to female bond-servants only.
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"Male servants who lack sexual
desire," refers to hired hands or household servants who, because of some physical or
mental condition, are devoid of sexual desire. This is applicable only under the following
two conditions: that they are the servants of those into whose houses they are given entry
and that they lack sexual desire.
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"Children who are not aware of
women's nakedness." These are small children whose consciousness of sex is not yet
developed. But if evidence of the sexual urge is noted among them, a woman should treat
them like non-mahrem men even though they may not have reached puberty.
This verse does not mention maternal and paternal uncles because they
customarily occupy the same status as the father. A hadith states, "The man's uncle is like his father."
(Reported by
Muslim.)
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Whatever of the woman's body
is not allowed to be shown constitutes her 'awrah. It must be covered, for exposing it is haram.
Consequently, with respect to non-mahrem men and non-Muslim women,
a woman's 'awrah is her entire body with the exception of her face and hands, accordingto
the interpretation we have preferred. We agree with al-Razi's argument that Islam has
permitted her to expose those parts of the body, the face and hands, which need to be
exposed in order to carry out daily busiand for giving and taking; it has commanded her to
cover what it is not necessary to expose, and has forgiven her accidental, inadvertent
exposures or such exposures as are required by necessity. All this is in accordance with
the flexibility of Islam. Says al-Razi, "Since the showing of the face and hands is
necessary, the jurists had no choice but to agree that they are not 'awrah, and
since the showing of the feet is not necessary, they have differed concerning whether or
not they are 'awrah.'' (Tafsir 'awrah.'' (Tafsir of
Fakhr al-Deen al-Razi, vol. 20, pp. 205-206.)
With respect to the above-mentioned
twelve categories of mahrem relatives, a woman is permitted to expose her hair,
ears, neck, upper part of the chest, arms, and legs. Other parts of her body, such as the
back, abdomen, thighs and two private parts, are not to be exposed before anyone, man or
woman, excepting her husband.
The above interpretation of the ayah is closer to its intent
than that of some other scholars who say that, with respect to her muharramah (Plural of mahrem. (Trans.)) and other Muslim women, the woman's 'awrah is the area
between her navel and knee. Rather, the intent of the ayah seems to support the
opinion of some scholars who say that with respect to her muharramah the woman's 'awrah
is that part which is not exposed while she is doing her housework; that is, whatever
is exposed during the course of her daily chores may be seen by men who are her muharramah.
That is why Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala commands the believing women
to cover themselves with a loose over-garment whenever they go out, for in this way they
may be distinguished from non-believing and loose women. Allah Ta'ala commanded His
Prophet (peace be on him) to convey to the whole ummah of Islam this divine
message: O Prophet! Tell thy wives
and daughters and the believing women that they should put on their outer garments (jalabeebihinna);
(That is,
whenever they are outside the home or inside it when non-mahrem men are present.
(Trans.)) that is most convenient in
order that they may be recognized (as Muslims) and not be molested.... (33:59)
During the period of jahiliyyah some women used to go out with
the attractive parts of their bodies, such as the neck, upper part of the breast and hair,
exposed, and the loafers and lechers would follow them about. Accordingly, this noble ayah
came down, commanding the believing woman to cover herself with her garment so that no
provocative part of her body would be visible, because her appearance would make it clear
to everyone that she is a chaste, believing woman, no lecher or hypocrite would dare to
molest her.
It is clear from this verse that the reason for this injunction is not
the fear of women's misbehavior or mistrust of them, as some people claim, but the danger
to them from lecherous and evil men; for the woman who decks herself out, walks
seductively, or talks invitingly always attracts men who lust after her. This verifies the
Qur'anic verse, ...Then do not be
too pleasant of speech, lest one in whose heart there is a disease should feel desire (for
you).... (33:32)
Accordingly, Islam insists that the Muslim woman cover, and so protect herself; no
concession is made in this except to reduce it somewhat for old women. Says Allah
Ta'ala: And the elderly among women who are past (the
prospect) of marriage—there is no blame on them if they lay aside their (outer)
garments without displaying their adornment; but it is better for them to be modest. And
Allah is Hearing, Knowing. (24:60)
By "the elderly among women" is meant such post-menopausal
women as have no desire for marriage or sex, and to whom men are not attracted. Allah has
made this concession for them so that they can put aside their covering garments, such as
the chaddor, abaya, burqa, jilbab, and the like. However, the Qur'an makes the
condition that this should not be for the purpose of displaying the* adornment but only
for ease and comfort. Despite this concession, it is preferable and better for them to be
more perfect in their dignity and far removed from any suspicion: "but it is better for them to be
modest." (24:60)
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In consideration of Islam's
concern for women's 'awrah and its proper covering, the Prophet (peace be on him)
warned the Muslim woman against entering public baths and disrobing in front of other
women, who might subsequently make her physical characteristics a topic of their gossip
and vulgar comments.
Similarly, the Prophet (peace be on him) warned the Muslim man against
entering public baths without a waist wrapper. Jabir narrated that the Messenger of Allah
(peace be on him) said, Whoever
believes in Allah and the Last Day must not enter the public bath without a lower garment
(to cover his private parts), and whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day must not let
his wife go to the public bath.
(Al-Mondhari in Al-Targheeb says that this was reported by al-Nisai and by
al-Tirmidhi, who classified it as "good.", Al-Hakim reported it and called it
"sound.")
And 'Aishah said, At first the Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) prohibited people
from going to public baths, but later allowed men to enter them wearing a lower garment.
(The wording is
from the report of Abu Daoud; also reported by al-Tirmidhi and Ibn Majah.)
Exception to this prohibition is
made for the woman who suffers from some illness for which warm baths are beneficial and
for women following childbirth. 'Abdullah ibn 'Amr narrated that the Prophet (peace be on
him) said concerning public baths that Men
must not enter them without a lower garment. Prevent women from entering them except when
sick or after childbirth. (Reported by Ibn Majah and Abu Daoud. One of the transmitters is
Abdur-Rahman Ziyadah ibn 'An'am al-Ifriqi.)
There is some weakness in the transmission of this hadith,
but it is supported by the rules of the Shari'ah which makes concessions in
worship and other obligations for a sick person, and by the well-known principle that what
is prohibited as a precaution becomes permissible in the case of need or benefit. It is
also supported by a hadith reported by al-Hakim on the authority of 'Abdullah ibn
'Abbas, who narrated that the Prophet (peace be on him) said, 'Beware of a building called the Public Bath.' Some people
said, 'O Messenger of Allah, it certainly removes dirt and benefits the sick.' He then
said, 'Then whoever enters should cover his nakedness.' (Reported by
al-Hakim, who
classifies it as "sound.")
If a woman enters a public bath
without a valid reason or need, she has committed a haram act and deserves the
censure of the Prophet (peace be on him). Abul Malih al-Hadhali reported that some women
from Homs or Damascus came to visit 'Aishah and she said, "Are you from a place where
women go to the public baths? I heard the Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) saying,
A woman who removes her clothes (i.e., goes
naked) outside her husband's house tears down the veil (hijab) between herself and
her Lord.'' (Reported with this wording by al-Tirmidhi; also reported by Abu
Daoud, Ibn Majah, and al-Hakim, who classified it as "sound" (al-targheeb).)
And Umm Salmah narrated that the Prophet (peace be on
him) said, "If any woman takes
off her clothes outside her own house, Allah will tear His covering from her."
When Islam takes such a strict
view of women's entering public baths which are, after all, buildings with four walls in
which only women are allowed, imagine its judgement concerning the nearly-nude women lying
about on beaches and the swimming pools, exposing their nakedness to the hungry and
lustful eyes of every passer-by without any sense of shame. Assuredly they have torn down
every veil between themselves and their most Merciful Lord. And their men are partners in
their sin, since they are responsible protectors of their women. If only they knew!
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The morals and manners of
the Muslim woman are quite different from those of non-Muslim women and the women of the
time of jahiliyyah. The Muslim woman is chaste, dignified, self-respecting, and
modest, while the woman who is ignorant of thedivine guidance may be vain, showy and
anxious to display her attractions. Such display includes exposing the attractive parts of
the body, walking or talking in a seductive manner, displaying her ornament", wearing
revealing and sexy clothes, and the like.
The variety of ways in which women display their attractions is no
secret to people, ancient or modern. In commenting on the verse concerning the women of
the Prophet's household, And be in
your houses, and do not make a display of yourselves in the manner of display of
jahiliyyah...., (33:33)
Mujahid remarks, "Women used to walk about among men Qatadah says, 'They used to walk
in a seductive and sensuous manner;' while Maqatil says, 'The displaying of attractions
means putting a cloth on the head without tying it, and toying with the necklace,
earrings, and other ornaments in a provocative fashion."'
The ways in which women displayed themselves during the period of
pre-Islamic jahiliyyah included mingling freely with men, walking seductively, and
wearing a head-covering in a manner which exposed the ornaments and beauties of the head
and neck. But during the present period of ignorance of the divine guidance the display of
feminine attractions has gone to such vulgar extremes that the women of the pre-Islamic
era appear in contrast to be models of chastity and dignity!
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The correct Islamic behavior
required of Muslim women which keeps them from wantonly displaying their attractions is
characterized by the following:
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Lowering the gaze: Indeed, the most
precious ornament of a woman is modesty, and the best expression of modesty is in the
lowering of the gaze, as Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala says, ...And tell the believing women that they should lower their
gazes.... (24:31)
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Not intermingling with men in such way
that their bodies come in contact or that men touch women, as happens so often today in
movie "heaters, university classrooms, auditoriums, buses, streetcars, and the like.
Ma'qal ibn Yasar narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) said,
It is better for one of you to be pricked in the
head with an iron pick than to touch a woman whom it is unlawful to touch
(Al-Mondhari
says, "It (this hadith) is reported by al-Tabarani and al-Bayhaqi, and
al-Tabarani's transmitters are authentic and sound.)
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Her
clothing must conform to the standards laid down by the Islamic Shari'ah, which are
as follows:
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Her dress must cover her entire body with the exception of
"that which is apparent," which, according to the most preferable
interpretation, refers to the face and hands.
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It must not be transparent, revealing what is underneath it. The
Prophet (peace be on him) has informed us that, Among the dwellers of hell are such women as are clothed yet naked,
seduced and being seduced. These shall not enter the Garden, nor shall (even) its
fragrance reach them.
Here the meaning of "clothed yet naked"
is that their light, thin, transparent garments do not conceal what is underneath. Once
some women of Bani Tamim, who were clad in transparent clothes, came to see
'Aishah, and
she remarked, "If you are
Believers, these are not the clothes which befit believing women." On another occasion, when a bride wearing a sheer and transparent
head-covering was brought into her presence, she commented, "A woman who dresses like
this does not believe in Surah al-Nur." (Surah 24, which together with Surah 33 (al-Ahzab) contains
many injunctions concerning purity and propriety, man-woman relations, and dress.
(Trans.))
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Her
dress must not be too tight so as to define the parts of her body, especially its curves,
even though it may not be transparent. This describes many of the styles of clothing
current in the sensuous, materialistic civilization of the Western world, whose fashion
designers compete with one another in devising clothing for women which tantalizingly
emphasizes the bustline, waist, and hips, etc., in order to elicit the lustful admiration
of men. Women who wear such clothes likewise fall under the definition of "clothed
yet naked," since such a dress is often more provocative than one which is
transparent.
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She must not wear clothes which are
specifically for men, such as trousers in our time. The Prophet (peace be on him) cursed
women who try to resemble men and men who resemble women, and prohibited women from
wearing men's clothing and vice-versa.
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In her choice of clothing she should
not imitate non-Muslims, whether they are Jews, Christians, or pagans, for Islam
disapproves of conformity to non-Islamic modes and desires its followers to develop their
own distinctive characteristics in appearance, as well as in beliefs and attitudes. This
is why Muslims have been asked to be different from non-Muslims in many aspects, and why
the Prophet (peace be on him) has said, "Whoever
imitates a people is one of them."
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The Muslim woman walks and talks in a dignified and business-like manner, avoiding
flirtatiousness in her facial expressions and movements. Flirting and seductive behavior
are characteristics of wrong-minded women, not of Muslims. Allah Ta'ala says:
...Then do not be too pleasant of speech, lest
one in whose heart there is a disease should feel desire (for you).... (33:32)
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She does not draw men's attention to
her concealed adornment by the use of perfume or by jingling or toying with her ornaments
or other such things. Allah says: They
should not strike their feet in order to make known what they hide of their adornment.... (24:31)
The women of the time of jahiliyyah used to stamp their feet
when they passed by men so that the jingling of their ankle-bracelets might be heard. The
Qur'an forbade this, both because it might tempt a lecherous man to pursue her and also
because it demonstrates the evil intention of the woman in attempting to draw the
attention of men to herself. Similar is the Islamic ruling concerning the use of fragrant
perfumes, since here again the intention is to attract men by exciting their desire. A hadith
states, The woman who perfumes
herself and passes through a gathering is an adulteress. (Al-Mondhari says, "This
is reported by Abu Daoud and al-Tirmidhi, who classifies it as sound and good." It
has also been reported by al-Nisai, Ibn Khazimah, and Ibn Hibban in the following words:
"Any woman who perfumes herself and passes by a group of people so that her scent
reaches them is an adulteress." Al-Hakim also reported this and said, "It has
sound transmitters.")
From all this we know that Islam
does not require, as some people claim, that a woman should remain confined to her house
until death takes her out to her grave. On the contrary, she may go out for salat, for
her studies, and for her other lawful needs, both religious and secular, as was customary
among the women of the families of the Companions and the women of later generations.
Moreover, this early period of Islam is considered by all Muslims to be the best and most
exemplary period in the history of Islam. Among the women of this time were those who took
part in battles in the company of the Prophet himself (peace be on him), and after that
under the caliphs and their commanders. The Messenger of Allah (peace be on him) told his
wife Saudah, "Allah has
permitted you to go out for your needs." (Reported by al-Bukhari in his book Marriage in
the chapter entitled "Women May Go Out For Their Needs," on the authority of
'Aishah.)
He also said, "If someone's wife asks his permission to go to the mosque, he
should not deny it to her." (Reported by al-Bukhari, on the authority of 'Umar.)
On another occasion he said, "Do not prevent the bond-maids of Allah from (going to)
Allah's mosques." (Reported by
Muslim.)
Some very strict scholars are of the
opinion that a woman is not allowed to see any part of a man wis not her mahrem. They
base their ruling on a hadith reported by al-Tirmidhi on the authority of
Nabhan,
the slave of Umm Salmah, that the Prophet (peace be on him) told Umm Salmah and
Maymunah,
his wives, to veil themselves when Ibn Umm Maktum entered. "But he is blind,"
they said. The Prophet (peace be on him) replied, "Buare you blind, too? Do you not see him?"
However, researchers say that
the manner in which this hadith has been transmitted renders it unsound. While the
narrator here is Umm Salmah, the transmitter is her slave Nabhan, who had no
concern with the incident nor any need to report it. Even if the hadith is sound,
it simply shows that the Prophet (peace be on him) was very strict in respect to his wives
because their exceptional status required greater modesty on their part; Abu Daoud and
other great scholars have commented on this exceptional position of the wives of the
Prophet (peace be on him). In any case, the significance of the following well-established
and sound hadith remains uncontested: The Prophet (peace be on him) instructed
Fatimah bint Qais to spend the required period of confinement ('iddah) following the death
of her husband at the house of Umm Sharik. But he later changed his mind, saying,
My Companions gather in her house. Go and stay
with Ibn Umm Maktum, since he is a blind man. If you uncover yourself he will not see you.
(Tafsir of al-Qurtabi, vol. 11, p. 228.)
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A woman may serve her
husband's guests in his presence as long as she adheres to the Islamic standards in her
dress, movements, and speech. They will naturally see her and she will see them, and there
is no harm in this as long as there is no danger of involvement on either side.
Al-Bukhari, Muslim, and others have reported Sahl ibn Sa'd
al-Ansari as
saying, Abu Usayd al-Sa'adi invited
the Prophet (peace be on him) and his Companions to his wedding. The food was prepared and
served by none other than his wife, Umm Usayd. She had soaked some dates in milk in a
stone pot overnight. When the Prophet (peace be on him) had finished his meal, she mashed
the dates and brought the drink to him.
Shaikh al-Islam Ibn Hajar commented that,
"From this hadith we conclude that a woman is permitted to serve her husband
and his male visitors, just as the husband is permitted to serve his wife. It is evident
that her serving the visitors is allowed only if there is no fear of temptation and if she
is properly dressed; if the wife is not properly dressed (as is the case with a majority
of women in our time) her appearing in front of men is haram."
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We must be aware that in
regulating the sexual drive Islam has prohibited not only illicit sexual relations and all
ways which lead to them, but also the sexual deviation known as homosexuality. This
perverted act is a reversal of the natural order, a corruption of man's sexuality, and a
crime against the rights of females. (The
same applies equally in the case of female homosexuality. (Trans.))
The spread of this depraved practice
in a society disrupts its natural life pattern and makes those who practice it slaves to
their lusts, depriving them of decent taste, decent morals, and a decent manner of living.
The story of the people of the prophet Lut (Lot) as narrated in the Qur'an should be
sufficient for us. Lut's people were addicted to this shameless depravity, abandoning
natural, pure, lawful relations with women in the pursuit of this unnatural, foul and
illicit practice. That is why their prophet, Lut (peace be on him), told them,
What! Of all creatures, do you approach males and
leave the spouses whom your Lord has created for you? Indeed, you are people transgressing
(all limits)! (26: 165-166)
The strangest expression of these peoples' perversity of nature, lack
of guidance, depravity of morals, and aberration of taste was their attitude toward the
guests of the prophet Lut (peace be on him) who were angels of punishment in human form
sent by Allah to try these people and to expose their perversity. The Qur'an narrates the
story thus: And when Our messengers
came to Lut, he was grieved on their account and did not know how to protect them. He
said, 'This is a day of distress.' And his people, who had long since been practicing
abominations, came rushing toward him. He said, 'O my people, here are my daughters. They
are purer for you, so fear Allah and do not disgrace me in front of my guests. Is there
not a single upright man among you?' They said, 'Thou knowest well that we have no right
to thy daughters, and certainly thou knowest what we want.' He said, 'If only I had
strength to resist you or had some powerful support!' Said (the angels) 'O Lut, truly, we
are messengers of thy Lord; they shall not reach thee....'(11:77-81)
The jurists of Islam have held differing opinions concerning the
punishment for this abominable practice. Should it be the same as the punishment for
fornication, or should both the active and passive participants be put to death? While
such punishments may seem cruel, they have been suggested to maintain the purity of the
Islamic society and to keep it clean of perverted elements.
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The pressing need to relieve
himself of sexual tension may drive a young man to masturbation.
The majority of scholars consider it haram. Imam Malik bases his
judgement on the verse, Those who
guard their sexual organs except with their spouses or those whom their right hands
possess, for (with regard to them) they are without blame. But those who crave something
beyond that are transgressors, (23:5-7) arguing
that the masturbator is one of those who "crave something beyond that."
On the other hand, it is reported that Imam Ahmad Ibn Hanbal regarded
semen as an excretion of the body like other excrete and permitted its expulsion as blood
letting is permitted. Ibn Hazm holds the same view. However, the Hanbali jurists permit
masturbation only under two conditions: first, the fear of committing fornication or
adultery, and second, not having the means to marry.
We are inclined to accept the opinion of Imam Ahmad in a situation in
which there is sexual excitation and danger of committing the haram. For example, a
young man has gone abroad to study or work, thereby encountering many temptations which he
fears he will be unable to resist, may resort to this method of relieving sexual tension
provided he does not do it excessively or make it into a habit.
Yet better than this is the Prophet's advice to the Muslim youth who is
unable to marry, namely, that he seek help through frequent fasting, for fasting nurtures
will-power, teaches control of desires, and strengthens the fear of Allah. The Prophet
(peace be on him) said, Young men,
those of you who can support a wife should marry, for it keeps you from looking at women
(lit., lowers your gaze) and preserves your chastity; but those who cannot should fast,
for it is a means of cooling sexual passion. (Reported by
al-Bukhari.)
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